IN TURMOIL...

Life and its turmoil! You loose sleep,you are out of control,you think to that limit as if thee is no tomorrow.

You try to sleep but thoughts keep seeping in somewhat like a perrenial stream. Amidst such deadlock ZAP!goes your mind and you fall asleep finally.

Yet you are constantly arguing, complaining, thinking of ways to escape, to ease situations and you realize you are not really sleeping.

Oh! Insomnia? Or some sort of insomnia? sigh!

You turn on the light, drink some water, rest your head on the ever supporting wall, light a cigarette, inhale smoke with utmost satisfaction, release it with some pleasure on head, think, think, think....!

You notice still-ash at the butt of your cigarette and sigh! 'Oh! shit ...its over.'

You gently drop it into the stingy ashtray, you drink some water again, turn off the light, lie down and enjoy your head thats on a spin ride!

ZERO

" You feel ZERO when you discover funny mysteries of life. At times, you can't help yourself from experiencing the heartiest laughter of your life time! "

BEAUTIFUL EYES...

I never thought you had such
beautiful eyes - until i saw you
in my dream.
Your words addressed the crowd,
And i was one amongst them.
A little nervous you were
but you delivered at ease.
Your eyes met mine
And i saw the beauty of your
Eyes. Eyes that said, 'Hey You,
thinking about me?'
We were exchanging our
thoughts with our eyes.
Eyes that shone,
Eyes that smiled,
Eyes that seemed disturbed,
Eyes that made comeback,
Eyes that teased. And
Eyes that stood still,
Eyes that showed affection,
Eyes that showed care................

Words seemed to fade away
And the crowd dissapeared.
Our beings dissolved
But your misty eyes shone!

How beautiful!

YOU...

Shatter my combed hair,

tear my shirt

And dig nails on my body.

I remain calm.

My calmness will add fuel

compelling you to shower

words. Words that hurt,

that will mock this existence!

I remain calm.

Push me,

and i will hold you.

Yell at me,

and i will look pale.

Cry. And my hand will touch yours.

You throw it away,

And i will hug you.

Sob! And i will pat you with care.

For i love you,

for what you are.

I understand you.

And know there is nobody

who understands better than me.

I love you,

My calmness your care!

I know deep within,

you are the most

wonderful person i have ever met.

To look for a gem

you need to unearth it.

I found without unearthing it.

It lay open amidst stones.

I am lucky to pick you.

For this bearer knows its true worth.

FILTER...

I am not perfect,
I am annoying,
and i hurt.
But hey! loved ones
dont dare finger at me.
Want to get physical?
I am ready.
I know no fear.
Fight me,
but dont keep any grudge.
I give a damn
if you are my foe.
But hey! you are my friend.
I love you.
I might be wrong,
refusing the matter fact
for some odd reasons.
But hey! give me time.
Everyone takes time
and i'll come to say sorry
and ask for your forgiveness
if found i was wrong.
But dont keep grudge
and dont you conspire
for that will hurt me.

I have hurt the whole lot
including my ' self ',
And i hate this shit!
I hate my being
when jealousy flows.
Grieve! when ego flies high.
Shriek! when hate speaks.
Spat! when force swells.
Sigh! when pride glitters.
I dont like it
and i get infected easily
if the carriers around.
But hey! friend,
it took time to realize this
And i try to change.
I am human not God!
It will take some time
to clear these termites.
I cant burn them
for it will destroy me too.
Oh! Anger , St. Anger
wish i could control you.
So much would have been saved
And so many nurtured.
But i cant forsake you
For you are my power too.

And that has made all the difference!

' Hole .'

I thought i had a hole
deep within my bossom.
I remember my tiny hands
clutching it with sobs.
How i used to lean on those
fence with eyes wide open,
looking at plumpy ants
as my tears trickled down.
A downpour for the ants!

As we were playing hide and seek,
Smile never found me,
And laughter was lost forever.

Today, a flutter and i go breatheless,
A pang of surprise, i shiver!
A tear drop, it aches.
Oh! I thought i had a hole

deep within my bossom!

SACRED WORLD...

It's like running nude,
in the enchanted wild
when i am with you.
With nothing to hide,
I dwindle every corner
with cries of delight!
I am all myself, an open book,
It is wonderful being with you!

Behold! Stranger.
Let hostility remain on the other side,
Let fear not trample this rich soil,
Nor do sweep the new born flowers.
Caution! Stead with care,
least you ground some weeds.
It's a sacred world,
Shun those eyes that cast greed
And destroy the mother of malice
from those metal mines.
For this is a sacred world,

Let the beauty remain!

DARK MATTERS...

Does devil reside here?
Come silence.Murky thoughts
fill my head.
They arrive crippling on the surface,
clenching greedily to avoid falls.
Conscience lay slained.
Echoing from some distant land,
it makes me shiver for a while.
Yet, i follow towards the
ever chanting noise of filth!
Somehow the blazing hell
welcomes me as their chosen one.

My head is a box, that clutters
with every move i make.
It takes a single rage
to arouse this monster,
A moment of lust
to dismantle beauty,
And some pride

to finish a life!

LET LOOSE...

As i lie down on this open field, my mind marches to and fro assembling past, present and future. A little while ago my brain was all clitter-clatter like an empty box with noiseful elements within.You just need a jolt and it goes clitter-clatter,clitter-clatter how horrible! .However, lying down on this grass field and looking up at the sky makes me feel blessed, and that is when i get to communicate with the creator of this amazing perfect order! I weigh my situation , ponder over my crossroads in life, think about things left to be done, gasp some air and sigh!I decide to forget about my wordly ties and explore the starry sky. I connect stars that are placed in a uniform pattern only to take delight of the weird finished product.Sometimes , i form a cross and mostly animals and birds.The clouds are more interesting because they keep changing.With no one around the peace and tranquility is worth ravashing.I return late at night from work and my steps move towards this enchanted field.The hullabulla of this lively world is at rest and most of them are snoring to glory!

But thoughts do creep up every now and then reminding me of deadlines, incomplete projects, my dream job, my passion for the moving art and where i stand today.Sigh! again. I shake off to drop these details and yet some manage to cling and now their shouts are even more louder.'No .you need to be alone.your mind needs rest', says my inner voice.I follow immediately.I see a bird hopping under the lamp post and i go to meet him.The bird flys away.I tell him i am not going to harm you, i just want to hold you, at most maybe i would pat with affection. I approach and the bird flys again. My inner voice tells me...'remember not to follow a thing like the bird.No matter how good your intentions are it will never understand, your efforts will go in vain.'Really my anticipation yielded nothing although i was pretty convinced with my love for the bird.I thought we would make good friends.

FREE...

Mombay he-haws when set free,

galloping across the setting sun.

Its a treat to the eyes of an artist.

His gay eyes meet the cool breeze,

swaying with an air of authority.

The wind cajoles around his black body,

as he strodes on balanced heels.

The saddle is gone,the rope is gone,

No lashing whip!

He races towards the horizon.

As his heart beats faster,

he thinks of 'silence and i'.

Until he notices 'hoofs and thuds'.

Ah! Life!...it relieves him,

He shakes off 'silence and i',

he-haws with alls his might

and races towards the horizon.

TRIBUTE...

Death comes on the tides of time,
Soaring high from its mighty base.
It's at hand with every birth of
a new life.To trail around,
only to meet its purpose- Death!

The last act is its only purpose.
Executed indisputably and conclusively,
Uncertain and yet so binding.

As the flowing stream moulds solid rocks,
reducing them to round finish,
Death grins with mocking eyes,
as he thinks of sand grains!

REBEL...

As he stands on the edge of a cliff

his life takes a brief parade.

It leaves door ajar that were sealed.

The trapped air gushes out,

damp air that brings fresh yesteryear!

Tears trickle down his cheeks

to join the fall below.

Damp eyes trail around to meet hope,

that says,'life'll never be the same'.

The rebel hangs like an old coat,

the never change attitude still remains,

but it needs some sunshine,

some amount of fresh air, and,

maybe a soft touch of caress.

Battered by rains of criticism,

tattered by innumerable cries of 'don't'

snarled by the system,

This rebel lies disheveled,

discarded like a leper!

An iconoclast with a faith of steel,

his head held high takes the plunge.

Silence!

He emerges, crawling on the shore...

With a wicked grin on his face,

Lets the white sand flow,

from his ever clutching fingers.